


What could have happened

by Linhaku



Category: GTA V, Grand Theft Auto V, NoPixel, NoPixel RP
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, Hurt, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-27
Updated: 2020-02-27
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:46:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22929682
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Linhaku/pseuds/Linhaku
Summary: Reed wants a divorce, and Ryan doesn't tackle it wellRyan Parker is played by Curvyelephant and Reed Dankleaf is played by Reed0 on the GTA V server NoPixel, and can both be found on twitch
Relationships: Reed Dankleaf/Ryan Parker
Comments: 1
Kudos: 9





	What could have happened

"Ryan, I want a divorce"  
"WAIT WHAT?"  
"Yeah, you're never really around,"  
"Wait no, I've changed Reid,"  
"You've said that before, I've given you chances,"  
"Reid I can do it!"  
"Listen, I can't have an old lady that is never around,"  
"..."  
"Okay listen, you get a week to prove it,"  
"So we're not divorced?"  
"No just separated, having feelers out for others"  
…  
…

"Listen, while we're separated, I should probably tell you I have been seeing Lauren Forcer, and Mia Mersion,"  
"Really Reid? Mia, my best friend?"  
"Yeah, she's single now, did you know?"  
…

Tears dripped from his chin down on the blood-stained paper map. The map he got from Reggie when he died in the war. 

The war Ryan had been partly at fault for. 

To Ryan, I leave my blood-stained map of Los Santos.   
Don't lose yourself because of people you hate, else you will end up like me and no one wants that.   
Take care of Reed.   
That's what Reggie's testament said. 

"I-I'm... sorry Reggie," Ryan cried, "I don't think I can take care of him anymore."

Why does the color of the world fade so quickly? - Ryan Parker on Twatter.  
He cries while typing in the update, not really meant for anyone but himself. 

Reid was right, Ryan really wasn't around much. But time had went by so fast, and he didn't really notice.   
In his head, they were just together. All the times he confidently had yelled "I'm taken!" and threatened others to stop harrassing him before he called for Reid. 

Twatter pinged with people asking what was wrong.   
Text messages on his phone  
"Where are you? Wanna talk?" - Mia, 

"Heh, Mia does deserve a good man like Reid. She really does," 

Hey, u okay? - Gazz

Gazz. The adoptive son he never really was a good parent for. God how he hated himself for that

The sun had risen high and was about to set again without Ryan had noticed.   
Three hard knocks were heard on the front door to his apartment by the beach.   
"Oi, Ryan! You in there?" Irwin Dundee yelled in his Australian accent and knocked once more.   
Ryan tried to stay silent, but his sniffles was impossible to control properly anymore.   
Oh, how he had hoped it would be Reid coming to check on him instead. He broke down crying into his pillow, not moving an inch from his bed to let anyone in.  
"Hey, u wanna go rob a store or something?"   
Ryan didn't respond.   
And Dundee left. 

No, he needed to get up. He needed to do something, even though everything hurt.   
Maybe first some alcohol to take some of the pain? He didn't have anything in the apartment, but he did have some cash lying around. 

Taking a not so obvious car to the local gas station, he looked at the assortment.   
Everything hurt.   
Everything.   
He liked the taste of whisky, it was something he drank to celebrate.   
And even though there was nothing left to celebrate, he couldn't resist the urge to get the taste of it.   
It could really drown a whole day out in blackouts, and that he could use. A lot. 

3 bottles of whisky under his arm - some for now and some for tomorrow - he sat in the car and looked at his phone again.   
Lots of messages, none from Reid.   
"He's probably busy, as always." Ryan said to himself unscrewing the cap on the first whiskey.   
Dark thoughts crept into his mind once again while taking the first sip   
\- why should Reid care anyway?   
They were separated, Ryan's problems was no longer Reid's.   
Maybe that's what he wanted, Ryan could be a bit of a drama queen, he knew that. 

Sad love songs blasting through the speakers and a whiskey at the passenger seat, Ryan cruised along the beach road. Apparently, no police was out here today. 

When a third of the whiskey in the bottle was gone, Ryan had reached the area where Reid had bought a trailer for the two.   
Ryan couldn't resist stopping there. Maybe Reid would be around? 

He looked inside the home, but Reid wasn't there.   
The rooms smelled of weed and unwashed dishes sat in the kitchen sink and at the coffee table on top of the small traces of meth.   
The bed in the bedroom was messy, but the room was filled with the scent of Reid.   
Crying and aching Ryan, hand over his mouth, stumbled outside and slammed the door. This was too much.   
He sat down close to the door where he had placed the other whisky bottles. 

This was it, he had to make a choice. 

He took out a notebook and a pencil and started writing.   
"Reasons to stay with Reid, *sniff* let's see um. Pros and cons." Ryan wrote and hiccupped and tore the paper off, continuing his writing mindlessly, not really paying attention to the paper anymore, and his writing turning automatic and uneven. He downed the last of the first whiskey bottle, and looked at his phone - no new messages. His list of cons had continued to the next page; "Unworthy, a nuisance, not good enough, not even a good sex toy anymore," Was he just a toy to Reid? Had he never loved him? No, no he loved him, but... but he didn't anymore. Ryan really hoped he had gotten to show Reid how much he loved him. He wasn't the best at showing affection.The list grew and papers laid around Ryan on the ground. He really hurt, and the voices did all they could to deepen that feeling. Last papers words got all weird and unreadable from the tears staining them. 

His skin started to itch, and he pushed the pen hard against his palm, trying not to clear his head. That did feel good.   
Oh god, the carvings in his chest, from when he was kidnapped to get back at Reid. Those would always remind him of their time together.   
He took off his black shirt looking at the uneven letters. With the almost full whiskey bottle number 2 in hand, he looked at the scar, the papers around him and then at the bottle.   
The bottle touched his lips, he choked a sniffle, and downed the whole bottle, and found his pocketknife.

Fumbling to get his phone up, he went to his favorite contacts and picked his one and only; his Reid. 

"Yeah, it's Reid,"  
"*Sniff* He-Hey Reid, um,"  
"Ryan?"  
"Heh, y-yeah it me! Uh um... Reid I umm." He wiped his nose in the back on his hand  
"I-um. I'm sorry, I did something ssstupid. Again. Um, bye Reid."  
"Wait, Ryan?" but the call was ended, and an address was pointed out on his phone. His home. Reid jumped on his bike speeding to the home. Something was wrong. 

Ryan's Regina stood in front of the home, and Reid parked beside it going around to head inside and find out what Ryan meant. He saw Ryan on the ground beside the door, papers all around him, whisky bottles at his side, and without a shirt. Without a shirt and with cuts all over both arms and his chest, and a knife in his hand resting on his arm with blade down onto the skin. 

"Ryan!" Reid ran to him over the papers and lifted Ryan's head looking into his eyes and throwing the knife out of his hand. His eyelids slid slightly open, eyes looking hazed and red from crying. "R... Reid?" He sounded sleepily and drunk, his breath clearly alcoholic. Reid quickly turned Ryan to lay down, taking his own shirt off and pressuring to the cuts on the chest. "Lemme sleep," Ryan's voice was small, his breaths slow and uneven. 

"Hello? Need EMS at this address right now! It's Ryan!" Reid shouted to his phone and looked around the mess. Only one of the three whiskey bottles are half filled, the others empty, and no sign of vomit. 

"Ryan, I need you to puke," Reid turned him, and held his head up, as he puts two fingers deep in his mouth. Ryan's body jerked, and he vomited, trembled, and went limp again. 

"Come on, don't do this!" he laid him down, putting pressure to the chest again. Reid looked at the papers. 

Reasons to stay with Reid.   
Pros; it's Reid, he's nice, protection, love?   
Cons; He doesn't want it, he doesn't love you anymore, Rudy, gets in trouble with gang, you're unworthy, unlovable, unaffectionate, never around, a mess, not worth waiting for. The next paper is filled with similar words, and the next and the next.

Dear Reid, I'm sorry for not being the husband you deserve. You deserve the best, and I thought that was me, but I was mistaken. Please stay you. I'm sorry I made a mess by your home. -Ryan

"Don't do this to me Ryan!" Reid cried pressing harder at the chest, and shaking his head.

EMS arrived and drove off immediately with Ryan in the back and Reid by his side. 

"Blood pressure dangerously low, give blood immediately! Alcohol amount in blood unknown, start rehydration too. Oxygen mask on, and someone keep an eye on his heart rate," The doctors ran around Ryan, trying to stabilize him, with Reid just looking at it all, standing still in the room. Having the heart rate going towards normal, the doctors looks to the cuts on the chest.

"Reid? You're listed as Ryan's emergency contact. There's good and bad news; the cuts on the arms are only superficial and will not be a problem. However the cuts on the chest are deeper and he lost a lot of blood. On top of that he had dangerously high amounts of alcohol in his system, making our job difficult. He seems to be stabilizing, so I think you called just in time. We need to close the cuts on the chest, but with that amount of intoxication we cannot give sedation. It might be best if you wait outside."

"Right" Reid just stood there listening, trying to process what had just happened. Being let outside the room he sat at the first seat outside the room. 

A high-pitched scream from Ryan and commotion was heard from the room. Reid pressed his hands over his ears, tears dripping from his face onto the floor. 

"He is stable, and will be waking up in a couple of hours." A nurse informed him, and crouched in front of him, "I think you should know, he mentioned your name and said he was sorry before he fainted." 

Fighting to open his eyes and the sudden bright light made him blink hard. His body felt heavy and something covered his mouth and nose. He was in the hospital, Ryan could see. On a chair beside him sat Reid, his hand holding Ryan's and head resting on top. Ryan moved his thumb, stroking Reid's chin. He sat up and looks at Ryan melancholically smiling at him. Reid started tearing up, and jumped on top of the bed hugging Ryan.  
"Don't you EVER try to do that again! You hear me?" He cried into Ryan's shoulder and smiled at him; "You know I'm no good without you."

"I'm not sure what happened, I can't really remember much. But I'm never doing that again."

"And I'm never leaving you again."  
And the two was inseparable once again.


End file.
